So what I do in my own time is what keeps my mind sharp and keeps me loose. A few weeks ago we had some comedians do a show up on Camp Liberty. They were pretty good, the typical "blue" comedy you'd expect, but they were pretty funny. One of the jokes one dude dropped was that Kuwait isn't a country it's a button on a microwave. That's a fact. The birds down there hunker down in the shade during the day and their mouths are wide open, like they're gasping for air. It was a funny observation if you've been there and experienced it. When I went to get my hair cut it was so hot outside that they would hit you with a blow dryer that blew cool air in order to dry the sweat on your head. THAT is hot!
So when we were in Kuwait, like I said, it is just like being inside an oven, with a fan blowing hot air on you. There is no indoor plumbing in the transient tent areas--every drop of water used in the camp gets trucked in. So guess what that means--porta johns. Yep, plastic chemical toilets left out in the sun to simmer. They had these small hard-stand kind of toilets, but they stunk even worse than the porta johns. You go in there and you better don your M40 protective mask, and they didn't have lights. So anyway, you're in these porta johns just trying to get it done to minimize your time inside, and people would find the time to write some pretty entertaining graffiti. At Camp Buehring there is great appreciation for Chuck Norris. Not just his body of work on film or on television, but for the principles for which he stands: truth, justice, and The American Way. There is a website everyone who reads this blog should visit: http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com
Some of my favorite entries:
--Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun;
--Chuck Norris is suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs;
--There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist;
--CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass-kicking in real time;
--Chuck Norris' calendar runs from 2 April to 31 March. No one fools Chuck Norris;
--Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink;
--Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to spice up his steaks;
--Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face;
--Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"
Okay, last one...
--Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
NOPE!!! One more...
--How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.
When you're sitting in a plastic box that's so hot it could melt just trying to get 'er done and go back inside the tent, this stuff makes you laugh out loud. Check out the website.
The last thing I wanted to do today was show some pictures of what I call "T-wall art." T-walls are the concrete slabs that stand up and protect buildings, tents, and containerized housing units (CHU's) from shrapnel and small arms fire. It's not uncommon to see them decorated by units that come through here with unit crests and so on. Camp Buehring was fat with the painted ones. I've found some pretty good ones here that people ought to see, so here are a few:
Time for me to do other things. thanks for coming by.
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